The Man with Two Left Feet, and Other Stories

“It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“He was one of those earnest, persevering dancers--the kind that have taken twelve correspondence lessons.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“Musical comedy is the Irish stew of drama. Anything may be put into it, with the certainty that it will improve the general effect.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“A dog without influence or private means, if he is to make his way in the world, must have either good looks or amiability.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“Mother always used to say, 'If you want to succeed in life, please the women. They are the real bosses. The men don't count.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“I must explain Henry early, to avoid disappointment.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“You go away and have a nice cup of hot tea,' said the agent, soothingly, 'and you'll be as right as anything in the morning.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“Sex attraction is so purely a question of the taste of the individual that the wise man never argues about it. He accepts its vagaries as part of the human mystery, and leaves it at that.””

— P. G. Wodehouse

“They walked on in silence. Katie's heart was beating with a rapidity that forbade speech. Nothing like this very direct young man had ever happened to her before. She had grown so accustomed to regarding herself as something too insignificant and unattractive for the notice of the lordly male that she was overwhelmed. She had a vague feeling that there was a mistake somewhere. It surely could not be she who was proving so alluring to this fairy prince. The novelty of the situation frightened her.””

— P. G. Wodehouse