Paul T. Gilbert

“We need to recognize, however, that when we accept ourselves as we are, and life as it is, we may find it easier to find peace and contentment within ourselves. This is absolutely not a position of passive, defeated resignation but rather it is about looking around to see what we can do now with what we’ve got. It’s about ‘being in the moment’ as opposed to living in regret and with ‘if onlys’ or ‘isn’t it unfair’ or ‘I could have been . . .””

“The passions, motives, wants, lusts, fears and vengeances of our ‘old brain/mind’ can hijack the capabilities of our ‘new brain/mind’. When it does that, we simply find ways to satisfy those desires or find reasons for feeling what we feel, supporting our prejudices. Emotions can suggest their own self-justifying reasons. ‘I feel it, so it must be true,’ we say. ‘I feel anxious, so this must be dangerous and I should avoid it.’ ‘I feel disgusted, so this means it’s bad.’ ‘I feel that this is wrong; therefore it is.’ ‘I feel that I can’t trust you; therefore you are dangerous to me.’ We don’t question what we feel or do because we have ‘gut feelings’ and urges that we’re right.””

“It’s compassionate because, although taking what might seem an easier path in the short term (e.g. avoiding doing anything) might give us temporary relief, it doesn’t take us anywhere””