Punchinello, Volume 2, No. 28, October 8, 1870

“By ORPHEUS C. KERR, Continued in this Number. See 15th Page for Extra Premiums. +--------------------------------------------------------------+””

— Various

“Leaping forward, the Reverend OCTAVIUS wrung both the black worsted gloves of Mr. BENTHAM, and introduced the latter to the old lawyer and his ward.””

— Various

“The poet, when he wrote "Thou wilt come no more, gentle ANNIE," was clearly laboring under a mistake. If he had written "Thou wilt be sure to come again next season, gentle ANNIE," he would have hit it. Lecture committees know this. Miss DICKINSON earns her living by lecturing. Occasionally she takes a turn at scrubbing pavements, or going to hear WENDELL PHILLIPS on "The Lost Arts," or other violent exertion, but her best hold is lecturing. She has followed the business ever since she was a girl, and twenty-four (24) years of steady application have made her no longer a Timid Young Thing. She is not afraid of audiences any more. It is a favorite recreation of the moral boot-blacks and pious””

— Various

“One bright October morning in the year 1828, a lone lorn woman by the name of GUMMIDGE might have been seen standing at the corner of a wheat-field where two cross-roads met and embraced. She was weeping violently. Ever and anon she would raise her head and gaze mysteriously in the direction of a cloud of dust which moved slowly over the hill toward the town. Her name was FATIMA. FATIMA GUMMIDGE. "Sister ANNIE," she cried, "what do you see?" But sister ANNIE was far away. She was not there. She was attending an agricultural fair in the beautiful young state of Kansas. Thus gracefully do we introduce our heroine upon the scene. The reader will be able to judge, from this, whether we are familiar with the literature of our day, or not. He will be able to form a complimentary opinion of our culture. He will perceive that we are acquainted with the writings of Messrs. JAMES, and DICKENS, and BLUEBEARD. There is nothing like impressing your reader with an adequate sense of your ability for laborious research, when you are doing biography for a high-toned journal.””

— Various

“European travellers””

— Various

“hung on the rack, besides numerous other small portable articles of vertu that””

— Various

“card, and asked if "WASH." was in. He eyed me strangely. (Most people when they first””

— Various

“STRASBOURG, October 14”

— Various

“Shan't I take that anshient circus tent?" said he, pintin' to my umbreller, "and lock it up in the safe?””

— Various